January 2012
5 posts
2 tags
i apologise for letting my head
overtake my heart and win first
place in the race to spill words
to your delicate self.
i am more fluent in spewing
hate when frustration bubbles
through my bones and dissolves
my reasoning.
your words of honesty, endless
patience and heart of pure love
remind me that in the end,
i will come home.
2 tags
i twist the lid and breathe in deeply.
as the scent fills my veins, i become
intoxicated by your half-hearted
promises and float into limbo.
coming down feels distant as
you trace my ribs and mutter
nothings into my ear. i slip from
consciousness and breathe.
as i scratch against my cheeks,
you wait patiently for my chest
to restart it’s rise and fall. you
leave and i fall into...
2 tags
sometimes, falling apart feels
so deliriously easy when there is someone
to catch you as you trip over scattered insults
and torn connections.
2 tags
as the humdrum heartbeat and
quiet continuity of everyday life
whirs in our skulls, we forget
that we’re lucky to be alive.
3 tags
the calamity of us is overwhelming. pressure builds in my temples until invisible strings snap, releasing dead matter into the air around me. rubble settles at my feet and i am silently grasping at stale cells which once held importance and fortitude. as waves lash around me, i sink. my skin prunes under water and i become dead weight, quietly floating amongst seaweed and salt, waiting for a boat...
December 2011
2 posts
3 tags
you are cinnamon and apples strung together haphazardly and left to simmer until the timer rings. i am vanilla ice cream, flecked, balanced and carefully measured, not too little and not too much. as i stretch out my muscles and singsong out of tune, you unwrap me like the smallest of gifts, carefully undoing my creases and running your fingers along the tears in my wrapping. it’s the...
2 tags
i’m a heartbeat away from breaking, from suffocating in my own screaming and gasping for breath under the nightmares of darker times and lost friends. i am in the sea and you’re the only solid thing for miles. you do not break under my touch nor do you flinch when i grasp out during rushed sentences and damning words. in the silence you bestow, i take long breaths, unravel my fears and...
November 2011
1 post
4 tags
i just want to be there with you, lying in your bed. i’ll place the covers over our heads and we can pretend to be astronauts or cowboys instead. it’s not the complexity of distance that makes me wish so hard but the fact i think our friendship is pretty comparable to some form of art. it’s just simple being with you and it made me wish on stars. darling, that’s so new to...
October 2011
2 posts
3 tags
all i want is ten seconds to hold you. to breathe in your scent and stop this sinking feeling in my chest. to grasp onto the cotton of your shirt and stop the spinning in my head. to whisper ‘i love you’ into your skin and count the starts above our heads. all i want is ten seconds to hold you but sweetheart, i can’t.
3 tags
it started with a cough. a nervous splutter on the end of your tongue which rolled into a bigger, badder enemy to battle. as september rolls through with harsh winds and chapped lips it brings with it a harsh punching in your chest. a rapid knocking, a nagging sensation which never quietens. you don’t question it’s presence, until it delivers you a letter and the nagging sensation...
August 2011
4 posts
3 tags
my sweat makes patterns on cloth and nylon as i stew in your presence. hours seem like days as hushed whispers fill the air above our heads and i forget myself. my body looks ghostly from above, all rough bone and skin as i bite back answers. it’s a sort of therapy to let myself go. i walk away from being all lips and mouth and instead sink into the tones of your voice, hoping that you...
2 tags
“write about your first love or what you think a first love should/would be like?”
you were destructive in the kindest sense of the word, ripping through skin and flesh to get to the grit. the heart of the matter. past my tan lines and scarred hands you saw a vulnerability. a quiet moment to relax in and you took it. bathing in my blood and setting up home in my chest. you lived from...
2 tags
“cracking jokes so you don’t break down crying.”
outside there is rain. it settles on trees, comforting them into growing for another year and turning their leaves golden under the autumn sun. inside there you stand. staring past my head and into my lilac walls, avoiding eye contact as if it would give you heat stroke and leave you parched for days. i cannot perform magic or...
2 tags
it came in the post. i’ve worn it since may. now it’s august which is hot and heavy and full of scratched skin and broken smiles. i never knew a bundle of fabric, pretty strings and colours could ever mean so much to a girl like me. it’s there everyday, hanging from my wrist and clinging to me during my happiest moments. subconsciously i pull for it through tears because in the...
July 2011
4 posts
3 tags
you make me want to vomit. i’m not sure of where your body starts and as your fingers fumble down my skin i cannot help but spill words from my mouth, up and over. they escape so wildly that i inhale sharply and screw my eyes shut. my lips have become a waterfall, my words are unable to climb my freckled skin and back in, over and up back into the black mess of my heart. you make me want to...
3 tags
she is a fraying patchwork girl with seams full of love and thread gentle to the touch. under my gaze and observation she is sewn up with the brightest violets and marigolds, which hum the sweetest tunes and make me catch my breath. she travels through my veins with her shades of purple and dances melodies on my heart. she charms me with her hands full of yellow and heart full of sparrows which...
3 tags
i know that you’re scared but you cannot run from me. i am everywhere. i live in the soles of your feet and the pads of your fingers. the beating of your footsteps on solid ground is in time with my breath and i know that you hear the screaming child who lives in my veins and feeds on our darkest days. i know when you take a breath, it’s fast and then slow. your lungs deflate with such...
2 tags
you are a drop of food colouring. you seep into everything, changing it’s colour from grey to a bright purple, ripe on my tongue and soft on my skin. as i swim in your tones of plum and violet, nothing else has ever felt so close to ecstasy. nothing before has ever brought me over and up to fly upon oxygen and emotion alone. you detract the need for more and heighten my senses with 3...
May 2011
1 post
“The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.”
– E.E. Cummings
April 2011
6 posts
“that feeling you get when the person you care for more than anything in the world tells you that you make them happy, and that itself, is enough to make you happy.”
i like sitting at the back of buses and staring into skulls, watching people as they shift and change with the groans and turns of the road. this bus is much like my love for you. as you crumple beneath the harshest of...
“a girl who knows how to make everybody happy except herself. everybody seems to think she has it so together but no one notices that it’s only because she doesn’t know how to fall apart.”
sometimes i am not all brash but instead i creep into the corners of my mind where my heart keeps my what ifs and buts. i can coax a smile from you during the harshest of times, when...
2 tags
climb into my head, please darling, take that step.
i know you’ve forgotten the curves of my spine
and the shortness of my breath.
scatter your thoughts, please love, just let go.
i know you’ve forgotten the way i speak
and all of the words i know.
broken promises, i hear you, lies will always come.
i know the way you tell them
and how my heart sounds when you’re...
“As you grow, you learn more. If you stayed as ignorant as you were at...”
– Mitch Albom (via kari-shma)
2 tags
gabby,
i wrote this for you because i know you will always attempt to understand no matter what. i also know that can hurt you and so, this is me attempting to understand.
i hope i did you proud.
love, sarah.
“the feeling of helplessness when having to watch someone you love self destruct and having exhausted all means of helping or getting through to them.”
i am knocking...
2 tags
the dirt beneath our fingernails tells the truth more honestly than our lips or brains will ever manage. it is a collection of our hard work and late nights. the places we have been and the people we have been hiding from. although we may try our hardest to scrape these snippets of memory from underneath our tiny collections of DNA. we will never escape the fact that there will always be a small...
March 2011
3 posts
3 tags
you are neither feasible nor removable. as my veins sigh under your presence, my brain gives into another lust induced head rush and i am losing myself piece by piece. this could be a sure sign of deterioration or a sure sign of insanity. the cure is unknown and my heart is too weak to wait. i am heavy under your breath and tired from the salty tears.
i am not your jackpot but your joker, casually playing the game under the pretence that “i love you” could never sound so awful again. even the sweetest goodbye could not soothe my aching veins or comfort the dull thud, thud, thudding of my heart. nor can the bitter grinding of my teeth numb the discomfort of a year of life seeping through my being, out into the harsh reality of...
February 2011
6 posts
3 tags
my father always told me,
that laughter is the best medicine
but i am immune to it’s wonders
and sicker than i have ever felt.
you are the kind hearted girl
who tore down my walls
and walked away too soon.
you were the golden girl,
and brick by brick i rebuild myself,
shrinking back to my façade.
my father always told me
that i have a heart of gold
but i am full of...
3 tags
if i left today. i would become a silent shadow creeping along walls, making etches in your heart, leaving you with an aching cough that just wont fix. the only physical reminder of you would be an envelope full of paper, ink and kind words. i often wonder what someone would make of that little piece of your existence and yet, i still understand that they would never know of you stringing the...
2 tags
i would travel to the stars and back,
and google the word ‘almanac’,
just to show you that i lack,
the certain things you have.
i would cross a thousand galaxies,
and tell you what they made of me,
just to hope that you see,
the certain things you have.
darling i can wait for you,
i can hold you till it’s through,
because baby it’s just me and you,
surfing the...
1 tag
3 tags
hello and goodbye are both equally able to be the sweetest sound of your day, the cause of your bitterness and the moment when the last fragments of your skin fall and leave you breathless. these words i write can mould anyone into the harshest of realities, ineffable beauty or indescribable animosity. i hold so much power in my cells and it scares me, numbs me to the bone but i can do everything...
3 tags
through the forest where i walk,
while in my chest the ivy grows,
the steady beating of my heart,
is the loudest sound i know.
when climbing through the parts of you,
my throat becomes so blocked,
the steady beating of my heart,
while i hear my thoughts unlock.
through the trees my eyes do see,
the wild and wondrous water,
the steady beating of my heart,
leaves me reaching out in...
January 2011
2 posts
3 tags
one day a beautiful apology will come to you. it will open and unfold beneath your skin as your body revolves and turns like clockwork, undoing your seams and rewriting the way you breathe. tiny veins will form like roots and burrow through the flesh and blood to your heart. the centre of the your world, the tick, tick, ticking of your body and the thump, thump, thumping of your soul. one day a...
2 tags
December 2010
2 posts
3 tags
i hold so little power in my veins; my thoughts do not swell and grow but instead become stagnant under my skin. i am just a child who lives convincing herself otherwise. a weed hoping to bloom, the sky dreaming of the day it touches the ground, just hoping one day. just one day. it will walk.
2 tags
i untie your thoughts as if i am untying my laces. it’s a childlike movement. my fingers tucked under pieces of string, with a pop as the end leaves its washer. the result only empty canvas, metal and string, an inanimate object scattered on my bedroom floor.
as i step inside of you i learn that your lungs are made of much tougher stuff than your heart. you will always continue to...
November 2010
2 posts
3 tags
tell me darling, that we are not wasting time with games when we should be burying our heads in the fountain of knowledge, or exploring the way our veins carry not just our blood but our feelings to the tips of our fingers and back again.
the tossing back and forth of words and banter can’t tell me of the way a heart beats or how long it will be until the earth eventually folds in on...
2 tags
October 2010
4 posts
3 tags
the challenge i set myself this month was to write for anyone who gave me an idea in my ask box. this is my first completed work and it is for emily.
she wrote:
“adoring something so much it makes you think about the person you are, where you want to go & everything you know you are but cant seem to physically show.”
so i wrote:
if i could pluck my ideal from my lungs...
1 tag
3 tags
there are decisions we make
that crumble as soon as our
lips speak the words and
our brains process the thought
flowers crumple between our
thought process and rationality
because we are too quick
to think we are right
i am wrong and i cannot
continue to believe otherwise
or i will mould myself into
a ghost haunting your dreams
i am only the girl that
made her mistakes and
turned...
3 tags
September 2010
4 posts
“When I say, “I love you”, it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and strength. I’ve seen the best and worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what and who you are.” - Joss Whedon
3 tags
1 tag
1 tag
August 2010
2 posts
3 tags
“I love people. Everybody. I love them, I think, as a stamp collector loves his...”
– The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath (via tierneylee) (via theuniverseunderground) (via ntima)